Don´t Say "Just"....


"Bitch! What do you mean JUST?!" Moxie is saying to the Chocolate Princess in the picture (FYI..."Bitch"is a term of endearment among certain circles. Unless you are well versed as to when to use the term, do NOT use it).

After one of her shows, Moxie was taking a few pictures with those who attended. A shy, piece of Chocolate was next in line. She sat down beside Moxie, and complimented her on the show. "Thank you so much. And what are you doing here in Russia?" Moxie asked her.

The chocolate student proceeded to explain how she moved to Russia from Cameroon, to get her doctor´s degree. And her ultimate plan was to return to her homeland, and give affordable medical services to the unfortunate. In the midst of sharing her goals, she used the word "Just" a few times. I am JUST a medical student... or I am JUST going to use my schooling to help others...

As much as Moxie believes her own work is highly vital, she wouldnt dare assume it to be on the level of medical doctors and surgeons. And sat before her was a young, black girl basically belittling herself, and her life endeavors. "Why do you say JUST?", Moxie ask the girl. The girl shrugged and said that´s just the way she speaks.

It was New Years in Qatar. Moxie´s band just finished performing for the troops. She was surrounded by some female Marines, to take pictures. The girls were so excited to see Moxie, and thanked her for coming to their base to see them. Moxie asked them about their jobs. They repaired jeeps and damaged machine guns. Moxie couldnt believe their nonchalant attitudes about their talents. They were the most amazing women she had ever met, to be able to repair war jeeps and machine guns. She found it quite sexy, actually....

Fast forward to Moscow, Russia she was witnessing a similar attitude with the young, future Cameroon Student sitting across from her. "Bitch, what do you mean JUST!?..." Moxie interrupted her. The girl was on a lifesaving journey to help others, and was downplaying her value. Moxie knows this story very well.

"Are you a working mom?" Moxie remembers asking a lady who came to her show.

"Is there any other kind?" The woman quickly responded. The one questions summed up the attitude society has for women´s accomplishments.

It is HIGHLY vital for EVERY reader to understand that this is not a "DOWN WITH THE PATRIARCH" essay; nor a "WE HATE MEN. ALL MEN ARE BAD" Blog. It has simply been written so women can wake up from the passive attitudes we have adopted as a gender. This type of attitude effects women alot in the business world.

"....women in mixed-gender work teams tend to give more credit than is necessary—or even true—to their male colleagues. This is habitual: Instead of talking about themselves in an honest way, women give away the credit, talking about the great team they had, the collaborative efforts involved, the talents of someone, anyone, else. In some instances, women will even point to the negative aspects of themselves or their achievements instead of simply saying “thank you” or otherwise owning potential praise. Sound familiar?" (FORBES)

The word JUST should be used sparingly when speaking of our accomplishments. In Mox´s point of view, the young student might as well have said "Ì JUST left my country, JUST to get a better education. And I JUST learned the Russian language, JUST so i can earn a degree, so I can JUST help people back home once i become a doctor...Oh, I JUST spent many lonely, tearful nights away from my family and friends, as I work for my degree in a foreign land..."Of course, being boastful is a turn- off. But downplaying who we are certainly doesnt honor our hard work and sacrifices.

Let´s try eliminating the "devaluing of our accomplishments".

Let´s Go Ladies!!