Ive always had an idea of what I wanted to be as a woman. Lately, I have been seeing her more clearly in the mirror. And I am loving what I see!
The more I rebuilt the relationship I have with me, the easier it was to see the woman I have always wanted to be. For the longest time, I thought I treated myself with the utmost love. But recently, I learned that in actuality, I was being abusive.
Abusive habits tend to seem normal after a while. Once I started making changes, perspective about myself began to change. For example, I had a personal goal that I had set for myself. Time after time, I tried to obtain it. And try after try, I fail. No matter how hard I tried, I couldnt reach my goal. I pushed my myself mentally, physically to reach it. Self doubt set in, and the way I spoke to myself became defeating. It was a shock to learn that my expectations were too high; and I was abusing myself trying to accomplish it.
Those expectations were not mine. But they were beliefs of someone else, that I was told to see as authoritative. I talked myself into thinking this is what I wanted for myself. But it was what someone else wanted for me.
The more time I focus on getting to know myself, more person in the mirror grows more familiar....and more beautiful....each day.