He didn't touch you..so it's no big deal.

Yesterday, I posted on my social media about the verbal abuse I experienced. And the comments I received from men are the main reason why it took me so long to understand that verbal abuse IS abuse. It was only when my therapist read the texts that he sent me, as well as the last encounter I had with him, that I woke up to reality. She called it "psychological warfare" and told me to call the police. Once the police arrived, they told me what he had done was literally against the law, and encouraged me to get a restraining order.

"But he didn't touch you..."

"So you had a big fight. Couples fight."

"Are you going to take him back? Because you still love him. Right?"

"Just give yourself time to get over it."

"Boys will be boys."

These are just a few comments I received from my male friends. Even after some of them saw the horrific video, they still didn't grasp the validity of what happened. Have men been able to get away with this kind of abuse so long, that they actually think it's okay? Do they not understand how words can erode someone's mental health to the point of depression or even worse? How can psychological warfare and harassment be taken so lightly?

Though they know he's a very high-profile artist known by millions; that he threatened to not only destroy the career I paved for myself by having news outlets publish lies about me; but he threatened me with an illegal eviction from my own home, because he's good friends with the police. He convinced me that he could coerce mutual friends to fabricate lies about me. And he had me convinced that he had the power to have my visa revoked. I believed the things he said. I am a foreigner in the country; with no family of my own. No support. I've seen his power. I believed him.

I have had my life destroyed once before, dealing with the cult. Their "words" separated me from everyone I love; convinced me to keep quiet about the dirty things I saw and experienced in the congregation; brainwashed me with beliefs about myself that have taken me years to deprogram. How can people feel that verbal abuse is not as detrimental as physical abuse?

One day, I will tell my full story. I will share the video. I will post the texts; and I want to see if these men would feel the same way if these things were done to their daughter, sister, or mother. I guess this is why many of them complain that the only woman that will love them unconditionally is their mom. And that every other woman's love comes with conditions. Well, DAMN STRAIGHT!!

Their mother is the only woman who will love them no matter how they treat her. Their mothers are the only ones who are willing to stick around after they throw a temper tantrum and destroy her with words and insults. Why must a woman that CHOSE to be with them be treated like a hospital for the emotionally wounded and unstable? Or a verbal punching bag?

I'm stunned,