Moxie's monday motivation- F*ck forgiveness

Doctor Ramani Durvasula

Happy Monday, Foxy's. I think my upcoming Tina Turner show got me in my "F*ck forgiveness" era. I've been rewatching, studying, and rehearsing all things Tina, and it has caused me to reflect on my opinion about forgiveness. As someone who grew up in a cult, forgiveness was one of the cornerstones of our beliefs. Turning the other cheek was more than a cliché; it was a way of life. Even if a person ripped your heart out, forgiveness was the end goal.

 "They took away my safety. How the hell do you forgive that? I don't!"

But what I have always found is that forgiveness eroded my self-esteem. It lowered the value of myself in my own eyes because I allowed myself to be treated like a doormat. People wiped their toxic feet on me, and I was left to clean up the skid marks. And many of the marks remain to this very day. But I am learning that not forgiving someone doesn't make you a villain. It makes you your own personal hero. It's nothing to be ashamed of, the fact I choose not to forgive. Doctor Ramani put it so eloquently when she said, "They took away my safety. How the hell do you forgive that? I don't!" What a freeing and validating statement.

Some people don't deserve our forgiveness. Stay Unforgiving. Stay Foxy!

Your Student, Teacher, and Friend

MOXIE